Tomorrow

So tomorrow marks the 11th anniversary of the day Traveler and I tied the knot…just barely.  See, I was putting him on a bus for Sacramento so he could be checking in for Basic Training on the 28th of April.  We were planning for an August wedding, but then this whole Air Force thing happened…and happened fast.  We had talked about it over the previous couple of years as an option, but then he decided after a year had past since his mom died that he needed change desperately and this was a good way to go about it.  I was supportive.  I had grown up moving every 2 years from the time I was born, essentially, until I was 11.  I understood what “military life” meant.  As such, I wanted to exist in the eyes of the Air Force before he enlisted.  So we got married a Saturday morning at the Justice of the Peace.  We almost didn’t get married because when I called to make the appointment (which really wasn’t an appointment, the J.P was going to be there for an hour Saturday morning) they told me he would be there from 11-12 pm.  Luckily I am a perpetually early person, and we showed up at 10:50 only to find out that he was about to be on his way out at 11 to go play a round of golf.  (The schedule as he knew it was from 10-11.)  We made it by the skin of our teeth.  At this point I didn’t carry a purse, only a wallet in my back pocket, and with wearing a dress I didn’t have any pockets, and T forgot his wallet in the truck. We laughed and asked who was going to spot us $40 to get married.  T’s dad was closest and handed the cashier the money.  We had a sweet, simple ceremony performed by the J.P. and witnessed by my parents, T’s dad and step-mom, her parents, and my best friend.  It was perfect.  I was/am a pretty closed book.  I don’t share a lot with people, so to share this intimate moment surrounded by people I wasn’t close to or friends of my parents was not my ideal wedding.  (My mom and I had been at odds about how it was going to happen in August.)  I got the wedding I wanted.  Everyone at our ceremony plus T’s brother and sister-in-law went out to lunch at a nice restaurant afterwards.  I remember T’s dad asking me what specific things we wanted to change about each other now that we were married.  My reply to him was that we had already worked through all those things and there wasn’t much left to worry about changing.  It was a good feeling to know that what we had been through together over the past year and a half and how much we had both grown up.  We realized that we should just get past our superficial issues because I wasn’t going to run away and neither was he.  We were in it for the long haul.  I’m happy to say that we have made it through 11 years of marriage, 4 moves, 3 kids, finishing a college degree, living with my parents, and all of life in between.  There have been times of animosity interspersed throughout those years, but in my heart I know that I want us to work.  That I want him by my side fighing with me for the two of us and us as a family.  We truly are a team through wonderful times and through the difficult.  I love him with all my heart, and so my heart aches because this is the second year in a row that he has been gone for both our anniversary and his birthday (which is on the 22nd).  I know that I can’t count on him being around for those special dates, BUT I know that I count on him to be there on the days he is around. So tonight, I took my girls out to dinner to celebrate my anniversary.  (We have something on the calendar for tomorrow night, so that is why we celebrated tonight.)   We laughed.  We were silly.  They drank soda.  I drank margaritas.  And T was missed.  Deeply.

This latest round of trips has affected them all deeply.  Usually it is just SmartyPants who cries at night and can have bad days because she misses her daddy.  This time, I have woken up to have Sass sleeping in T’s spot a half a dozen times.  This morning Sweet Pea woke up and climbed into bed with me and fell back to sleep.  The girls missing their dad is a double-edged sword.  I’m so glad the girls have so much admiration, respect, and love for their dad that they miss him when he is gone, but at the same time I wish they didn’t miss him so much that it effects their mental state.  So I give them an extra squeeze and remind them that daddy loves them very much and I love them with all my heart.  They talk to him on the phone and tell him the highlights of their day.  Even Sweet Pea asks how T how his day was and what he did and in her sweet little voice says, “I miss you daddy.”  And my heart breaks a little as I’m sure his breaks into tiny little pieces.

So to my sweetheart of 15 years.  I love you.  I wouldn’t have anyone else by my side to travel this adventure of life with.  Thank you for allowing me to share your life.  It is an honor to share mine with you.

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3 responses to this post.

  1. This is so beautiful. Happy Anniversary.

    The wife in a military family is THE GLUE, the strong bond that holds everything together.

  2. I am honred to share a beautiful life with you as well. Miss you and can’t wait to come home.

  3. Okay, you almost made me cry! I love you two and hope you’ll have many more happy years together. You are two of the most down-to-earth, respectful, kind-hearted, genuine people that I know. I can’t imagine the two of you with anyone else, because then where would those beautiful little girls have come from? And we never would have met. Okay, only one glass of wine, and I’m all sappy. Happy Anniversary a little late and best wishes always!

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